Escaped gaming meme

[mithriltabby]

While I watch the build scroll by, it’s time to unleash another idea upon an unsuspecting world.

Chumblor, God of Fermentation and Revelry

The basic premise behind this religion is that alcohol is the lifeblood of civilized life. It purifies water, numbs pain, soothes the gums of teething babies and the joints of old gaffers, and promotes camaraderie. This is a religion that preaches moderation in all things, including moderation: getting completely tanked is a sacred rite, not to be undertaken lightly. A priest of Chumblor is more likely to be seen instructing people on watering their wine and beer at a noon meal than getting uproariously stonkered in a bar.

Rumor has it that Chumblor was once a minor deity in a pantheon, but managed to subordinate important divine functions like Agriculture, Love, Truth, and so on, and the former gods are now his archangels.

Chumblor does not maintain a separate afterlife of punishment, nor does he outsource to any of the mercenary hells. His afterlife is one big party filled with mirth and revelry; the difference between heaven and hell is that those who are being punished are ignored by all the other partygoers— no one will talk to them or dance with them or lie down with them in shady bowers— they get sick without getting merry, and there is no hair of the dog left when they awaken with wretched hangovers.

Quotes:
“Teetotalers, repent!”

Popular magics wielded by priests of Chumblor:

• Truthspell (in vino veritas)
• Combat effects usually involve incapacitating intoxication and hangover effects rather than direct harm; priests generally train in brawling techniques with improvised weapons. They’re not forbidden edged weapons, but they are enjoined to use them only on people who can’t be brought to their senses.
• Agricultural blessings
• Create food and drink
• Charm-like effects to make everyone peaceable, mellow, and friendly
• Curse of the Bitter Gourmet: no liquor is good enough for the recipient of this curse, and they are perpetually dissatisfied.

Legend has it that Chumblor has been known to show up to parties where he is celebrated (a fine idea stolen from daehith), and when he has been well pleased he has been known to leave behind a bottle of booze that has been blessed with miraculous power. (Basically a useful plot token for game masters.)

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[zevblue.livejournal.com]

I have seen the light, Brother Slothman, your humble acolyte awaits.